Gold Hill, Oregon: The Oregon Vortex and House of Mystery

I know it is a popular thing to write the Oregon Vortex off as fake.

I think that is beside the point. When you go see a magic show, you know that is illusion. If it's done well, you are still entertained. That may be a more sensible viewpoint.

It was entertaining. The guide did a good job explaining and keeping things moving, and I was interested the whole time.

As it happens, at Knott's Berry Farm they had brought back a part of the Haunted Shack for the anniversary. What you have is a photo op in a room that has a slant, but it doesn't seem to be a big slant. I appear much taller than my sister; I am shorter.

If you can construct one in a theme park, it seems unlikely that it requires a vortex, though Columbia Falls, Montana also claims one, along with a gravitational anomaly in Santa Cruz, California.

It also occurs naturally in a cave in Farmington, Pennsylvania.

The other thing that makes me suspicious of the House of Mystery is that for a building constructed in 1906 and sent downhill by a landslide, it feels pretty solid.

However, you do see a level and a plum line showing you that things should be one way, that is not the way they look.

Outside the shack you see water flowing up and golf balls rolling up. 

At least, that is what it looks like you are seeing. 

An investigation show, Fact or Faked: Paranormal Files, visited. They did agree that some of the things that you were seeing only appeared to be happening that way, and it was optical illusion. However, there were other things that they couldn't explain.

One is that in addition to the optical illusion, visually impaired people and people closing their eyes or blindfolded still hear and feel a change. In addition, the perceived difference is bigger than the actual slant should allow, and warm-blooded animals really do seem to avoid the place.

I know that when my sister was changing places with another person, I "saw" her body shrink. No, I don't think she really shrunk, but that is how it looked. I can't explain that. 

That particular mystery happened outside of the house.

http://www.oregonvortex.com/

https://www.oregonlive.com/movies/2012/06/fact_or_faked_paranormal_files.html

Knights versus Pirates: Buena Park Dinner Shows

We went to two dinner shows while in Buena Park: Medieval Times and Pirate's Dinner Adventure.

https://www.medievaltimes.com/

https://piratesdinneradventure.com/

With certain similarities between the two, and their remarkable proximity (there is only one building -- Porto's Bakery & Cafe -- separating the two), it seems the best way to review them may be in doing a head to head comparison.

Exterior Design: 

While the pirates are housed in a nice building, it does not look particularly pirate-esque, like maybe it could share the space with a burlesque show, and have previously been a Western-themed place, hypothetically. 

With Medieval Times you are entering a castle and courtyard, and it is duly impressive. Point: Knights.

Pre-Show Waiting Period:

This is a little less clear. It is probably fair to say that the Medieval Times interior has more to look at and of better appearance than the Pirate's Dinner Adventure interior, which seems overly dependent on Captain Morgan statues.

However, we preferred the souvenir selection at the Pirate's Dinner Adventure (more variety, less pretension) and the staff seemed friendlier. 

In complete fairness, part of our frustration with Medieval Times is that we arrived thirsty on a hot day. Because the soft drinks are included with your meal, they won't sell you any before; you can buy alcohol or really overpriced slushies. We took this experience to be well hydrated and not quite as early for the pirates the next evening, so we didn't get parched like this guy. Point: Pirates

The Actual Theaters:

The Medieval Times Theater is vast, which makes it kind of weird that the leg room was so awkward at their tables. Obviously with horses and jousting it needs to be, but everything was far away.

Everything was closer with the pirates, but the rigging sometimes did get in the way of viewing. There are other ways in which the set was more impressive for variety, with water and multi-level action, but I am going to call this one a draw.

The Meal:

At Medieval Times the half corn cob and the potato segment were so well-seasoned that it was kind of weird that they didn't season the chicken at all. However, I loved this combination menu/napkin:

There were no utensils at Medieval Times, and perhaps that is part of why they served in courses, to simplify. The Pirate's fare was served at once, with utensils. The chicken was better, as was the dessert, but the sides were not as good.

That would make this a draw, but while both places had vegetarian and vegan options, at Pirate's Dinner Theater the menus were viewable, and selections made when you made your reservation. I was able to request my shrimp skewer left off (allergies), and my sisters were definitely glad to not have to eat chicken again, though they did feel their ravioli kind of overdid it on the vegetables. That goes along with the customer service, and gives the point to the pirates.

The Shows:

The Pirates were a lot more fun.

The humor was worked in better. The humor with the queen at Medieval Times teasing her courtier, and him getting obsessed with Valencia oranges felt very forced and unfunny. No humor at all would have probably worked better.

The choreography for the pirates was better as well. They climbed and swung and incorporated silk (aerial) work and trampolines and fought with swords, guns, and fists, on deck and up the mast.

With the knights, every single joust involved one regular run, then one where the lances broke so they fought with some other weapon. Yes, the splintering of the lances can be exciting and create a sense of danger, but every single time? I don't understand why you would purposefully be so formulaic. I worried that I was missing things with the pirates any time I attended my food, but that was not a problem with the knights.

I was amused by the fakeness of some of the falls from horseback, but I get it: I don't want anyone hurt, including the horses. And that was when I started really not enjoying the show.

I started worrying that some of the animal treatment was cruel. I am no expert, but I started feeling very uncomfortable. I was not reassured by one apparent actual fall and difficulty in getting back on; there was a dapple grey horse that seemed to hate its rider. They appeared to change horses after that, which I guess is good, but I don't think I could go back in good conscience.

I did find this article: https://www.ocweekly.com/medieval-times-sued-animal-cruelty/

Speaking of sex discrimination (also in the suit), there were only two roles for women at Medieval Times, the queen and the falconer, either of whom could easily have been replaced with a man. Pirates were slightly more balanced, with eight men and three women (plus some soldiers). Pirates also had more audience participation, which was really a key part of both shows, but differently. Pirates got kids on stage, had audience members participating in challenges, and got us to sing and (kind of) dance. That was extra.

At both shows your table puts you in the section of one knight or pirate; you root for them and boo their rivals. That is normal, and there is no point in going to something like this unless you are going to participate. However, there needs to be conflict. This means that at one point, one section at Medieval Times was supposed to cheer for a knight who was breaking the codes of chivalry, and half of us at Pirate's were supposed to be cheering for the guys that were planning on murdering the princess and the mermaid.

I think there is a solution at something very similar to Medieval Times, the Excalibur Tournament of Kings in Las Vegas. When I was there (I admit, 20 years ago), at first the knights were competing, but then an evil wizard killed the king, and everyone needed to band together around the prince to defeat the wizard. I had thought something similar was going to happen at Pirate's with the Leviathan, but that was pretty underwhelming. The monster was vanquished easily, and it was back to whether or not the princess and mermaid would live.

Get the Leviathan to rise a little higher and make it the primary conflict. Then we can all cheer for everyone.

And Medieval Times could do something like that, except I will still not go back because of the horses. Corporate says it's fine, but so does Sea World.

 

(The Excalibur also had dancing girls to even up the number of women, but it's questionable whether that is really equity.)

Oaks Park Midway Games

I am currently focusing on attractions where the amount of time you have to visit them is limited. 

Currently, Oaks Park is on its Fall 2021 schedule, where the Midway games are only available Friday through Sunday from 12 noon - 7 PM. That lasts through October 7th, when they change over to the Scaregrounds. 

We have been there to play games twice, and have tried all ten games. T

This picture is intended to show you that we found our time worthwhile. On both visits we accomplished what we wanted, stayed under budget, and brought home assorted cool plush, despite not being particularly skilled at these games. 

I found the best value to be at Bob's Fishin' Hole.

Fish ponds are generally popular because anyone can do it and win a prize, but they are also usually over quite quickly. Bob's is more creative.

After netting three fishes and putting them in your bucket, your catch is "weighed", and then you find out what you won. Even when it is the smallest prize, you got to do more to get there, and we enjoyed it.

We won nothing at Ring Toss, but I was impressed by how many rings they give you. I mean, it still appears to be impossible, but you get many more chances to prove it.

For more targeted throwing, your options are Balloon Bust and Wrath of Willamette Willy. 

You see those stacks of three bottles? If you can knock them over, you can win a prize. 

Or you can throw bean bags at balloons that are against needles, so hitting them right will pop them. I feel like I do better throwing actual darts, but this is certainly safer if any of the players go really wild. That can be good, because Balloon Bust is right next to Roller Bowler.

Speaking of impossible! Well, maybe it is possible to get the ball to go over the bump and then come to a rest instead of rolling all the way back. I could not discover the appropriate level of force to do it once, let alone the ten times it would take for the large prize. However, it may still count as a good value, because each turn is only 25 cents. For the $5 you spend at the Fishin' Hole, you could have 20 turns. (But I could go all twenty without winning anything. I didn't, but I could.)

There are no prizes for the shooting gallery, but it can still be fun to try. I found it interesting that you could choose between how many shots or how much time, with each option providing its own specific challenges. I chose the number of shots, because that felt like less pressure and I really need time to use the sight.

What would a midway be without a water race game? I felt like this was a particularly good one because I beat my sisters both times we played. They might feel differently. 

The final two games (there is an arcade with video games, though we did not try that) were right next to each other: Pug Plinko and Sweet Spin.

Yes Plinko is like the game on The Price Is Right, but you don't have to climb a ladder to do it. The Sweet Spin is pretty simple: you spin and the color tells you which size prize you get. It's kind of like a traditional fish pond, where it is over really quickly, but it is easy to play and you are guaranteed to win something.

But that is not all! Right now you can ride the train for free.

There is not a lot of leg room, but adults can ride the train in a loop that reminds you of the option to picnic at the park, with plenty of shade and seating available.

After all, three adult sisters is still family fun.

https://www.oakspark.com/games

Outside Knott's Berry Farm

As much as we enjoyed our time in the park, we found the California Marketplace to be delightful. No admission is necessary there.

Of course, they get your money in other ways.

Coming from the hotel, the first thing we hit was a general souvenir store with an old-fashioned feel. Think the Emporium on Main Street in Disneyland. In fact, it is called Marketplace Emporium.

It connects to a candy store and bakery, and the bakery is what I want to recommend the most.

The prices were surprisingly affordable. They did a good job of highlighting boysenberries while still having other options. Those boysenberry tarts were only $4 and delicious.

Across the street was Peanuts Headquarters, for all of your Snoopy-themed merchandise, and displays.

Even the building got into the spirit of things.

While over there, we were surprised to notice some chickens walking along the road, including one magnificent rooster.

We watched in amazement, and worry that they might try crossing the road, but noticed other drivers stopping to look at them too.

We asked our waiter, who told us that there were more chickens on the other side of the underpass, but this trio liked to come over. When the street was closed they walked back and forth freely, but apparently they are in fact very aware of the cars.

I think the flock may have been originally been kept at ride designer Bud Hurlbut's office, but there is not a lot of information. (Humans can use the underpass to access additional parking, Knott's Soak City Waterpark, and the free Independence Hall replica.)

Perhaps they feel some affinity with this guy, but they are in an area where lots of chicken gets eaten.

If you want to eat at Mrs. Knott's, it fills up quickly. We were lucky to get in early (though that was kind of an accident in that the shopping caused a delay where waiting a little longer to enter the park seemed to make sense).

Chicken-To-Go only offers the fried chicken with sides and desserts, but the full menu offering in the restaurant is worth checking out, including these chicken and dumplings.

To-Go sides include the biscuits and boysenberry jam, but we also had the option of whipped boysenberry butter, so I think we made the right call.

Trips will often include travel days, where it may not be worth purchasing a ticket due to the limited time you can spend inside the park. You may find that you can happily spend that day outside the park.